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27 Sep 2010

Wish I were there

The Schaf was on Janice Long in the early hours of this morning, Janice had a good chat with the "seasoned traveller".

First Tomasz told us about his visit to Dubai; all skyscrapers, posh hotels and desert. He went down to the beach one day, and it was "scorchio" {i}; it would be if Tomasz was lying on his towel in his Speedos, but he was referring to temperatures of ~44C.

Poor Tomasz had gone down the beech without footwear-- he felt like an "idiot" because he was hopping around on the hot sand! The Schaf could never look like an idiot. Janice enquired as to whether he had "barbie feet": I'm not sure this was in a barbeque-- or Barbie doll {ii}! A delightfully quaint expression from the Long'un.

He also went to an Arabian camp, sounds fun. Even with my distaste for warm weather, I would go into the desert with Tomasz and a tent, and I'd put it for him. His Loveliness also rode on a jumbo out in the Far East, one of those double-decker airbusses no less.

After informing us about the weather, he told a tale of his soujourn in Paris. After his bike ride to Paris, he lost his rucksack (containing his best T-shirt and music player) in the X-ray machine for the Eurostar. Once aboard said train, he remembered, but it was too late [cue sinister].

Worry not dear readers, because The Schaf is cunning. Since French customer-service is almost as good as it is in the UK, you apparently cannot phone or email the lost-property-- only write to it! So our man did just that, he went to the lost property in Garde du Nord-- and was re-united with his lost property-- hurrah!

He was most upset about his t-shirt. It may be scruffy, but I imagine Tomasz looks a beau mec in it. I'd like to explore some exotic places with Tomasz, out of curiosity.

For the full interview, fast-foward to 1:14:08 in the next six days only.

Meanwhile, a treat on Outtake TV last Saturday for those who round on Tomasz for making mistakes and wonder why he hasn't been sacked: One or two clips of a certain forecaster making gaffes and facetiously reacting to them... step foward Alex Deakin! Another weather forecaster makes gaffes as well, blimey-- enough to make you splutter on one's copy of the Daily Mail.

{i} As for "scorchio", recalls the great days of Paola Fisch. Ah thethetheh Chris Waddle sminky-pinky thalia-he thalia-ha, Bhoutrus Bhoutrus Ghali...

Fast-foward to 2:40

{ii} New Barbie coming out soon. Barbie has a plush penthouse, sports car and expensive clothes. Ken is scruffy, despondent and has no house of his own. Look out for "Divorce Barbie" soon!


  1. Alex is a fantastic outtake creator: [Fast forward to 0:41] [forward to 0.45]

    LOL. Luckily not live - Tomasz wasn't to lucky!! :)

  2. Great work Matt. It's not just our Tomasz who slips up. But of course of the jealous bitches and queens on the likes of Youtube opt to ignore that, not realising his endearing gaffes and good humour make him all the more popular!